One thing I’ve noticed over the past couple of years is the number of people throwing around the word “triggered”, often in relation to speaking of “snowflakes”. I understand the mockery and lack of concern for those whom these people think are weak and whiny, but the word triggered is also used by those with ptsd and other traumas from their past that they are still dealing with. And many of these people are not ‘snowflakes’. These people have been to hell and lived to tell about it.

Sometimes it’s a topic, a name, a sight, a smell or a sound that is the trigger, and it usually has something to do with the act of trauma the person experienced. When something triggers the traumatized person, they are often forced to relive the trauma in their minds, or even in their bodies. Soldiers may react to fireworks that remind them of being shelled in the war. Talk of child abuse might be a trigger for someone who survived it. Church might a trigger for someone who was abused in a cult. A woman I know is triggered by the smell of cherry blossoms because of a sexual assault she experienced years ago. When these folks are triggered, the fears and memories of unhealed trauma come flooding back and can make it hard for them to cope in the moment. Some of these people have experienced abuse and horrors we cannot even begin to comprehend, and they deserve our compassion, not ridicule. Even the snowflakes because, can you really know what they have experienced or what trauma they are dealing with? Maybe some people don’t deal well with life because they’ve had it harder than you their whole lives but are still surviving despite lacking the skills needed to get past their past.

The reason I’m writing about this today is because out of the blue this morning, I read an article that ended up being a trigger for me, and found myself in tears about something that happened so many, many years ago. People who’ve been traumatized carry a little piece of that hell inside, and despite building a thick armor around it, those pesky triggers can be like kryptonite and blast through to that painful spot. This is why I advocate for being kind, always. You don’t know the hell, big or little, that other people carry in their lives. And if you have people you love in your life, I encourage you to be a safe person for them to be their true selves in your presence and a safe person to confide in. Those hells are a lot easier to bear when people are kind and our loved ones trustworthy enough to help carry our burdens.